Period: WAKE UP ASSHOLE, YOU GOT CRAMPS.
Period: How bout an entire chocolate cake for breakfast?
Period: How's that back pain? Feeling better? Let's fix that.
Period: Find a cookie as big as a house and eat it.
Period: Where's your Tic Tac box filled with ibuprofen?
Period: Got things to do? Don't care. Sleep.
Period: For dinner you're eating an entire bag of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups.
Period: Breeze blows by. Instantly horny.
Period: You didn't like those brand new underwear right?
Period: Yell at a puppy.
porrim-mama: tahthetrickster: i really like looking at google image searches for “firemen rescuing cats” or something because you get super cute pictures like AND THEN THERE’S THIS ONE
narcolepsy-realness: thelilnan: OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE OKAY AJAX SOAP THEIR SLOGAN IS “STRONGER THAN GREASE” AND I WAS LIKE OKAY YEAH MAKES SENSE FOR A DISH SOAP- WAIT AJAX WAS A GREEK SOLDIER RENOWNED FOR HIS STRENGTH AJAX IS STRONGER THAN ALL OF GREECE oh mY GOD
gagashairbow: can we take a moment in all this tragedy to just thank firefighters and policemen and doctors and even bystanders for rushing to help and risking their lives to try to help in any way that they can
floozys: hey followers is everyone feeling okay??? do you want some tea??? hot chocolate??? *puts in your favorite movie* *wraps you in fluffy blankets* *kisses your forehead* *whispers* i love you so much i just want everyone to be happy and safe
fuckyeahdragontales: my dad: who the hell is watching dragon tales on netflix? me:
Reblog if you've actually SEEN the movie "The...
gatagottago: misscontraption: catgh0st: Multiple times. I still sing “Everybody wants to be a cat” sometimes for no reason. I fucking own a copy of the original VHS release Hells to the yeah
heyitspj: scuzzmutt: what is the purpose of training bras??? what are we trying to teach the boobs they are trained to be the very breast
hermionejg: fishingboatproceeds: Sometimes I feel like tumblr doesn’t even care about sports. 99.9% of tumblr:
I DO NOT APOLOGIZE.
FOR MY RECENT SPAM OF ADVENTURE TIME, CATS, AND NUDE LADIES. I LOVE ALL OF THOSE THINGS. p.s I love butts.